hope in the Lord

Hope - in some ways, is very much like doubt. Small embers, glowing in the dark. Taking light, its flame slowing burning until it becomes a bright beam in the darkness.

Like a fire, it is beautiful to behold. Its warmth soothing on your skin. But when you come too close, it burns you. Out of control, it will consume you.

Hope can so easily be transformed into earth shattering disappointment. Anger. Resentment.

Unfounded. Misguided. Hope comes like a wolf in sheep's clothing.

Disguised as unanswered prayer. Hopelessness. Defeat.

The enemy is shouting in my mind: Where is this God that you believe in? He doesn't care about you! He doesn't even hear you! He is not going to answer your prayers. He has forsaken you! Does He even exist...? This God of yours.

WHERE is He?!

Words, lies - flowing like tears.

Why am I discouraged? Why is my heart so sad? I will put my hope in God! I will praise him again— my Savior and my God! (Psalms 42:11 NLT)

Hope can be a dangerous thing. Like playing with matches. Crushed hope burns you. Repeated, again and again, it will destroy you. Shatter you spirit. For the human spirit is only designed to take that much.

That is the problem with placing your hope in earthly things. It may change everything for you. But it might just ruin your life. Blackened like soot. Ashes, blowing away in the wind.

We need to learn to trust God fully. To place our hope in Him. Regardless of our circumstances. Or what we may think the solution will be. What it should be. To separate our expectation from our hope. To not be crushed when the solution we had expected turns out to be ashes in the wind. Blown away. Fading like mist in the sun.

Through Christ you have come to trust in God. And you have placed your faith and hope in God because he raised Christ from the dead and gave him great glory. (1 Peter 1:21 NLT)

When you pray without ceasing, continously, relentlessly. When everything is in the balance. When you need the solution the way that you need to breath. It is the hardest thing to wait. To be patient.

To put all hope in God - alone. In nothing else.

To not be swayed when your expectation is not met. To not come crashing down when the solution is not what you were expecting. What you were hoping...

Because then you have not been hoping in God.

We grasp at straws. As soon as something presents itself that could possibly change everything. That could be the answer to your prayers. That could - in one grande sweep - solve everything. We latch all hope onto that. We cling tight. We pray even harder. Please let this be the answer, God. Please.

You don't want to. Knowing the danger. Painfully aware of darkness lurking. But... Maybe this time... Could it be? You allow yourself that tiny glimmer. It sparks. Sets alight. Bursts into flame. Spreading. Consuming.

Until the earth is yanked out from underneath your feet.

And then, you have to - once again, burnt out - pick yourself up from black, shaky ground. Start all over.

Wait. Hope. Crash. Burn.

A vicious, merciless, destructive pattern. Threatening the very core of your existence. Exposing your flaws. Your weakness. Giving victory to the darkness.

But from burnt ground grows new life.

Lord, give me your unfailing love, the salvation that you promised me. Remember your promise to me; it is my only hope. Your promise revives me; it comforts me in all my troubles. With all my heart I want your blessings. Be merciful as you promised. You are my refuge and my shield; your word is my source of hope. Lord, sustain me as you promised, that I may live! Do not let my hope be crushed. (Psalms 119:41, 49, 50, 58, 114, 116 NLT)

We have to learn to break the cycle. To not be shaken. To stand firm in faith. Even if the solution may not be what you expect. Try a different angle. Have some more faith. Ask God to show you the way. Maybe you're not looking the right way. In the right places. Maybe you are going in the wrong direction.